It Ain’t Just Pure Dumb Luck
Everyone told me how lucky I am to find a husband who is so tolerant of me, who’s patient, who’s so loving. Firstly, in defence, I am not that bad. Like I said for the umpteenth times, there must be something (that you guys do not know about) that endears me to my husband that he is willing to do all these overtures for me. Give me some credit - I’m sure my hubby thinks I’m worth it. Either that or he is really dumb - but you know I don’t do dumb.
Anyway, being lucky is not what got me my man. Being lucky won’t even make it. It is pure determination, picking oneself up and trying again. Meeting your one TRUE one is not sitting on your jelly (read: butt) and dreaming. And there is like 0.01% chance that you get zinged! like the Jack-Rose combo. The thing is, I went through hell and back to have finally met THE ONE.
I started dating when I was twelve (it was sweet; fries and coke at McD after remedial class). I stopped dating at 22. So you do the maths, that’s 10 years of serial dating before I met the one! And I don’t even have a true-blue boyfriend at all! Even if I am seeing a guy for months, I am still dating someone else on the side. My relationships were never exclusive.
Nowadays, girls want instant everything. They want it fast-fast-fast. Speed dating over lunch?! Like seriously? Fast just don’t do it. Forget hollywood - it takes time to know and love someone. Fireworks just leaves you wanting more.
So what I am saying is that you need time to find the right one. And the meantime, if you meet someone you are not sure of, then he is not the one, so move on. Why waste time building on a relationship when you are not sure?
Anyway, if you still think I am lucky, then read some of the horrors that I went through to reach my “lucky” state: -
- My date got beaten up by a rival gang in a club, in front of my eyes. That was our first date (and the last!).
- A date’s idea of a first date is to Botanical Gardens! I promptly left him there with the monkeys.
- A date with a part-time model who is so narcissistic (he is beautiful - no doubt), he went to the toilet thousands of times to check the mirror! And get this, we went to delifrance - and he sat opposite a mirror and talk to himself all evening!
- A date who ended up being my stalker.
- A date with a guy who asked my General Manager for his permission to date me! I went out of sheer embarassment and pressure.
- A date who was two hours late (he claimed the car broke down). I waited just to leave when he arrived.
- Then there’s one who wanted me to be his girlfriend badly so he showed me his foreign currency bank balance to sway my decision. I still tell him no.
But of course, not all were bad. I had a good time too. There were sweet, memorable dates like a sandwich dinner at Sentosa’s beach guard tower, picnic at Bedok Jetty, watching planes at Changi runway…
So single gals (and Singapore has lots of them), you gotta work to find your one. They won’t fall into your laps (this will only happens after). And no, I don’t consider myself lucky. I consider myself ‘rewarded’ for all the hard work.
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